Day #23

Good evening folks. I would like to say I'm feeling great, but I'm not. Feet and back are on fire, have been all day. The worst is my feet. Really, how can I stay off of them? Hopefully they'll feel better in the morning, especially since I work tomorrow morning!

So, Shred report. Today was day #8 of Level 2. It's still tough, but I am determined to make it through the next 2 days. I am so sick of plank work it's not even funny. My challenge to myself this morning was to finish the final ab circuit with only one break. I did it! A 2 beat pause down on my knees. I should have pushed myself. Soon as I got back to it, she did the final count! I'll make that my goal for tomorrow.

It's been a long week. The boys have their last day of school tomorrow, then Spring Break. I think we all need the break. We have family coming this Easter weekend too! Can't wait.

Day #22...Shred day #21

 Oh, my aching everything! It's nearly bedtime, so I figured I'd better  do a little writing before I crash for the night....and get up in less than 8 hours to Shred again.

Today was Day #7 of Level 2...oh Jillian, how I love to hate you, then love you again when I'm done. I found the workout very hard today. It might have been because the Amazon and I were doing a lot of the same exercises. I'm not saying she and I are perfectly in sync, but I kept up with her more than I didn't. I don't know if  I will be ready to move up to Level 3 on Monday. I know, the words sounds familiar. They may be the very same words I used when I was closing in on the end of Level 1. I'd have to go back and check, but I probably won't. 

It was also "weigh-in" day for me. I am seriously considering dumping this practice.  I've been working at this, and I'm tired of being let down by the numbers on that scale every week. Time for my weekly reminder: This is a journey, there's nothing fast about it. I'm working at having a healthier "lifestyle" ( I REALLY hate that term). This is more about being and feeling better, and less about looking better...but it's a nice side affect. ;)

I also went to Junior High Orientation with Jacob tonight....the Junior high kids are in the same school and the Senior High kids here, though I feel better now seeing just how divided the space in the school is. So much information tonight about so many things. Poor kids just sat there looking stunned. Deer in the headlights doesn't begin to cover it! I tried to reassure him they didn't expect us to remember everything, but I'm not sure he believed me. My biggest concern is that my son is old enough to be in Junior High! What the heck???

Day #21......Bad Habits, Good Habits....Old Habits, New Habits

Monday morning....Shred day #20.....Level 2 Day # 6.... |Word on the street is it takes 21 days to make something a habit. Is exercising a habit yet? I have a sneaking suspicion it might be. When I had a rest day on Saturday, it felt a little odd. When my alarm went off at 5:55 am this morning, I surely did not want to get out of bed, but I did. I'll re-evaluate this new habit of mine in a week, and see where I stand.

So, the Shred today was....satisfying. It was not easy, in fact, I upped the ante and did half the workout with the Amazon. For the final ab/plank circuit, I only went down on my knees for a 3 count ONCE! That is what I call progress folks.I'm waiting for all this hard work to reflect on the scale, but for now I am happy with the wee bit of definition I see in my arms...and my slightly perkier butt.  ;)

Also on the agenda today was swimming with Sihdney's kindergarten class. There is nothing like watching  a swarm of little kids splashing in the pool, seeing how many ways they can get each other wet without getting themselves wet. 

Sihdney took another step ( stroke) on her way to independence. She said over and over she didn't want to go in the big pool, that it was too scary. Then, out of the blue she says she wants to go. I didn't ask her again, I grabbed her hand and off we went to find her a lifejacket.

It was cold in that big pool, especially after lazing around in the lukewarm kiddie pool. At first, it was like every time we go. She clung to me like a monkey, digging her little toes into my upper thighs ( I have tiny toe shaped bruises).  Next thing I know, she saying " Mommy, I don't need you."  She wanted me to let her go! I was so excited. So, gently, I let go of her lifejacket, leaving her to bob around on her own. Now, don't go thinking she was all relaxed, laying back and floating. Oh no, I've never seen anyone so tense and rigid stay afloat. Still, she let go of me and did it on her own! I couldnn't have been prouder if she had swam a langht of the pool!

The final excitement of the day was our meeting with Mrs. Gr. 3 and the Principal. (Education Madness post)

It was a positive meeting. There were tears ( hers), and sincere apologies ( hers as well). She asked me where I wanted to go from here. I said " I just want you to do what you said you would in our meeting last month!" So, we're back to her communicating daily with me, but rather than writing in his agenda, Mrs. Gr. 3 and I exchanged email addresses. She has assured us that she will endeavour to be more patient with him, we have agreed to continue to work with him at home. 

The points I mentioned above were just the gist of the meeting. The details are too long to type out, and really, at this point, I just want Behn to move forward and feel good about going to school. Tomorrow is supposed to be like Day One for them. Hopefully it all goes well.

So folks, that was Monday...Tuesday will be a snoozefest after today. I look forward to it...... oh wait, tomorrow night is Orientation for Jacob at the highschool.............oh geez.

Day #20...... " Day of the Bean!"

It's a fairly relaxing Sunday around here. Generally Sundays are, not much to do around this small town of ours. The sun is nearly out and it's just past 2pm. The snow is gone, but everything is still waiting to wake up. I guess the trees and the grass don't quite believe we've seen the end of the snow either.

I was up with my alarm at 8am this morning ( pretty darn early for the weekend). I dug my workout clothes out of my dresser ( and there were some there! I am getting caught up on my laundry). Out to the living room I went, rolled out my yoga mat and flipped the switch for the ceiling fan.

 So, Yoga Meltdown. I dare say I may be getting a little more flexible...a wee, tiny bit. Not sure I've gotten any more graceful, I only fell over a couple of times.

I've heard that the key to being smooth and steady with yoga is to feel calm and peaceful.Tough to do with the dogs whining quietly at me. Not sure if they were worried, or wanted to get close enough to lick the sweat off my face. I choose to believe they were worried.

Back to Shred tomorrow. Level 2, day #6.

Since then, I've whittled Mt. Washmore down to Washmore Hill, made a batch of chili for supper ( still simmering in the slow cooker), and I am attempting a new recipe...Black Bean Brownies. I am having some trouble with them, as the prescribed cooking time has left them soggy  in the centre yet. We'll see how they fair after another 10 minutes. 

Day #19........................

I had to take the day off today. I had planned to do "Yoga Meltdown", but when I woke up the first time with the dogs this morning, my back was still pretty sore.
I made the decision to have a rest day. I figure it's the first day I haven't worked out since I began this, it's all good. Right?
So, I went back to bed after the dogs did their thing, and just relaxed with a pillow under my knees. It was nice, even if I did feel vaguely guilty.

Tomorrow morning, I am going to attempt the yoga dvd with Jillian...we'll see how it goes.

Day #18... Shred Day #17

I've done it! I have made it to the halfway point in Level 2! I'm too tired to celebrate, but with a shaky hand I'll lift my coffee in a small salute....yay......

Did anyone else hear the snap, crackle and pop of my spine and shoulders today? It sounded loud as gunshots in the quiet of my living room this morning. Walking push-ups, my back cracked for the first sequence. For each one....it didn't really hurt, but it sounded awful!

I met my goal today too. For the final ab circuit, I went down on me knees twice, but only for the 3 count I had been aiming for.

For the weekend, I'll be doing "Yoga Meltdown" again. I'm kind of looking forward to the change of pace...kind of. ;o)

Day #17...Shred Day #16....

Day #4 of Level 2. I'm about midway through this level, IF I am strong enough enough to move up to Level 3 after 10 days of this. I have my doubts. 

My alarm went off before 6am again. I hit the snooze,  and I seriously considered resetting it and sleeping for an extra hour. Thursday is one of the 2 days a week I am a paid "cleaner", so I was laying there, justifying the extra sleep in my head.

" Well, what if I'm too sore to clean after I workout?"  Nope, no go, I know that at this point, I won't be.

"I can workout after I clean." I'll do it if I have to, but it really messes with my day.

"I could just take the day off all together, and Shred twice tomorrow." Would I?  The kids are all off school tomorrow, so the odds of me being that motivated aren't good.

So, I rolled out of bed, groaning. My feet screamed in protest ( I forgot to stretch them before I stood on them), and my shoulder twinged when I put my workout clothes on. I was dreading the plank work, and the ab work....ok, and the strength portion as well.  ;) 

The first 10 minutes we awful. Awful like the first time I did the Shred. I kept moving, grunting and sweating...loads of sweating. ( I am now in the habit of taking my glasses off before they fog from heat, and keeping a facecloth on the TV stand for swiping at my face). I kept going though, and found my rhythm. So the final plank/ab exercise, I did have to go down on my knees, but only for a 4 count...tomorrow I am aiming for a 3 count.

If everything goes according to plan, I am now past the halfway point of days to finish this program. Not sure what I'll do after this. To be honest, I never thought I'd make it this far.

Day #16...Shred Day #15.....

I was up before 6am today. Worried about going to the school about Behn's problems with Mrs. Gr.3 yesterday. So, I figured since I was up, it would be a good time to Shred. Burn off some nervous energy and calm my nerves.

Runners on, both bras on, ceiling fan on..... today was Day #3 of level 2. Oh my, parts of me hurt that haven't hurt since, ummmm, ever!I am starting to actively dislike the sound of Jillian's voice. I had to go down on my knees during the plank/oblique exercise at the end, my shoulders just refused to hold me up. I finished, and felt a small bit of satisfaction having done it. Nope, I take that back, I was very happy with my efforts.
I feel pretty good right now, more awake than I thought I would for sure. My muscles hurt, and my back is very sore from tweaking it the other day at my cleaning job.
Won't stop me, I'm in the groove. 16 days and no break from working out, no excuses! Well, I still make the excuses, as I'm putting on my workout gear. Then I stand up and get my arse moving.

Hether  called me crazy today for saying I preferred Level 2 to Level one. I know she said it with love, and I tend to agree I've lost a few pieces of my mind. I still stand by what I said though. This level is HARD, but I like it better. ;)

More Education Madness

So, Behn comes home today a little teary. Asher pipes up from the kitchen " Mrs. Gr.3  grabbed Behn's cheeks today!" Ummmm, what?

So, I sit Behn down and ask him what happened. He said that during math he was having trouble....(that means he was probably staring into space or doodling.) He said she came over, grabbed his cheeks and moved his head from side to side. Then she grabbed his hands and slammed them on his desk ( his words). At this point in his story, he burst into tears, and I am LIVID!

I called the school, and lucky day! She was still there. I told her I wanted to discuss an incident from Behn's day at school. She says "Oh really? What might that be?" SERIOUSLY? Like he wasn't going to tell me! I repeated what Behn had told me. Her response: " That wasn't how I perceived what I did." Her perception of the situation was not my chief concern at that point, still isn't.

This year has been a real struggle for him, and a lot of it has to to do with the personality clash between Behn and Mrs. Gr. 3 . I have had meetings with her, asker for her to send work home so I can work with him. At our last meeting ( about a month ago) she agreed to write me a note every day in his agenda to tell me how he's doing, what his progress ( or lack thereof) has been. A few times she has written what his homework was...that's it. 

Like I said in my other post " Education Frustration" about Asher, why are these teachers so resistant to helping me help my kids? I am present, I have spoken, and while they may hear us, no one seems to be listening.

Day #15.....Bummed but Bouncing Back!

 Tuesday is weigh-in day for me. I got up and hit the scale..... down .05lbs. Ok, it's a loss, and any downward momentum is a good thing. I also got out the tape measure.....down  and inch in the abdomen and hips, and one inch in the thighs . Pretty good. I guess. I wanted more! ( Don't we all.) 

So, here's where I remind myself that this is not going to happen overnight. It's a "journey". Bleck. ;o)  Seriously though,the results of the the changes I'm making will show, I just have to be patient. Certainly not one of my strengths. 

I did get up and Shred this morning. Level 2, Day #2. OUCH! It hurt a lot more today than yesterday. Maybe I pushed it a little after seeing my weight this morning...maybe I was a wee bit over confident after "liking" it yesterday. Anita is my new BFF this week. I am also enjoying the Amazon's discomfort with level 2...it's petty, but watching her struggle through makes me feel a teeny bit better.

Day #14....2 Weekaversary!

2 weeks in, look at me go! I'm feeling pretty good. Right now I think I can keep this up forever, and I am hoping the feeling sticks.

Today was day #1, Level 2 of the Shred. I was really dreading it. I've heard the horror stories, how it's so much harder than level 1, that I'd feel like puking.

I'm happy to report that it really wasn't that bad! Don't misunderstand, it was HARD. Jillian hard. I was sweaty, out of breath and red faced just a few minutes past the warm up. I like the exercises better, prefer the movement to the more stationary workout on level 1.

I'm doing the modified moves with Anita, she's my new buddy. The Amazon even looks like she's suffering...I'll wait a bit before I try to keep up with her. 

Maybe I won't feel so chipper tomorrow . Perhaps I'll wake up stiff and nearly crippled in the morning. Hopefully not!!!

Day #13....Why am I doing this?

I was first up this morning! Only by a few minutes, but I think it counts. I grabbed my yoga mat and Jillian's "Yoga Meltdown" and headed for the living room.

It was a struggle. I made it through, but let me tell you, I'm sure glad there are no mirrors in my living room. I know it wasn't pretty or graceful. Then again, maybe the mirrors would help. Would seeing myself sweat and groan inspire me to work harder? Maybe I'd turn away in shame, who knows. I fell over during the side plank reps, both times. How my arms shake holding that pose! I'm curious to see how I do with it next weekend. Ron came out of the bedroom and did the last 2 sun salutations with me....he said he felt stretched out, but he turned me down when I offered to start the dvd over so he could do it. Sihdney joined me for one leg stretch in the cool down, said "Whew!" and went off to get breakfast.
Tomorrow I am going to start Level 2 of the Shred. I'm a little scared, I've heard the horror stories of those who are ahead of me.
Why am I doing this? Well, I want to feel more energetic, and weightloss is certainly part of it. I hope that one day in the not too distant future I will feel like I am working with my body instead of against it.I also want my kids to see me doing something positive. 

Nearly 2 weeks in, I'm still trying to make this a "Lifestyle Change"....that's the term the kids are throwing around these days, isn't it? ;)  I've heard it take 21 days to make something a habit, so, in 8 more days this should be second nature....I'll keep you posted.

Day #12.... Yoga Meltdown and Tender Moments

I woke up this morning to a sunny day, kids making a mess breakfast in the kitchen, and sore feet!  I love that the kids like to make their own food on the weekends, and it's always an adventure to see the debris left in their wake. One day I will miss those messes, so right now I just try to enjoy their little forays into independence.
 

I did Jillian's Yoga Meltdown this morning. I thought I might find it a little easier this morning than I did last week. This workout is a whole different animal than "The 30 Day Shred". It's hard on the body, but stretches you out, and I like that. One day I'd love to go to a real yoga class, but this will work for now.My biggest problem challenge with it is I am always supporting myself on my hands. My wrists are killing me! I do feel looser and relaxed though. I'll do it again tomorrow. I'm not sure if I'm I'm ever going to love exercise, but so far my commitment is sticking.

On another note, not exercise related, I am right now witnessing a bonding moment between my daughter and my husband. It may be the blind leading the blind, but it's so sweet.

Sihdney received a jewellery making kit/machine for her birthday back in January. She hasn't wanted to use it until this past week. She thought maybe Daddy would be good at it, because he can build things. 

Daddy to Sihdney: " How does this thing work?"

Sihdney to Daddy: " I don't know!"

I report back on the finished product later today, hopefully there will be some photos. ;)

Day #11...again with the Shred

Today was day #10 with Jillian and her Shred, Level 1. I mostly kept pace with the Amazon. In fact, I pushed it a little too far. Maybe it was over confidence, or it could have been giving it my all for my last time on Level 1. I'm not sure. I do know that my shoulder and my knees have been screaming at me since about 5 minutes into my workout this morning.

My biggest challenge today ( other than initially getting myself up to work out) were the dogs. Every time I have floor work, they are on me! Sniffing, trying to lick. Booth curled up next to me while I was doing crunches! Seriously dog, does it look like I'm ready to cuddle? You might be wondering why I don't put them outside. Well, Dexter the miniature guard dog will bark at every breeze, shadow and perceived threat with such persistence that I can't stand to listen to him. The next suggestion could be putting them in their crate. Also a good idea, except Booth will keen and whine so much that I can't concentrate on the exercises.

Every challenge is just a goal to be achieved....not sure what I can achieve with these mutts of mine, but the exercise will pay off in the end.

Day # 10....... Shred etc....

What a day I have had! Mondays and Thursdays are busy days for me. Well, most days are pretty busy, but on these 2 particular days, I clean for someone here in town. Thursdays Sihdney comes with me, since she has no school. She gets to sit on the couch and watch cartoons on a very, very big TV. 

Anyway, we went in this morning as we usually do, heard the dogs barking in their room, and we went into the kitchen. I was taking my coat off and turned...and there were two of the biggest dogs I have ever seen up close! One of them is a Mastiff/lab cross, maybe the "smaller" one is too, I'm not sure. Here's where years of watching  "The Dog Whisperer" came in handy. I said" Let's go!", turned and walked down the stairs. They followed me!  ( I don't even know their names to call them!) I pointed in their room and miniature horse sized dog went in willingly....the pony sized guy wasn't so quick to follow. I'm thinking he figured he was free to roam fair and square, who was I to tell him where to go? I pulled my shoulders back, pointed and snapped my fingers, and to my surprise, he went in too! I closed the door, pulled on it to be sure it had latched, and let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. By the time I got upstairs to Sihdney, my heart was racing just a tiny bit. Sihdney's response to the entire thing? "Those are big dogs Mommy!"  

The rest of the day wasn't nearly as exciting. Did my usual errands, came home tired and wanting a nap. I put it out on Facebook  "....nap or workout?", got one vote for each. I decided to workout. Day #9 of Shred, still on level one. I hated it today. Not because it hurt anymore than usual, or I found it any harder. I just did not want to do it. I finished it, but there wasn't any real sense of accomplishment. I think I'm bored. 

My plan is to do Level 1 again tomorrow, that'll make it 10 days all together. This weekend I'll do her Yoga Meltdown to switch it up. Then, on Monday, Level 2 of the Shred. I've heard the horror stories, how you feel like puking before you finish it. I haven't even looked ahead to forewarn myself. I'm afraid I might chicken out if I know exactly what's ahead for me.

Day #9

Whew, Day 9! Never thought I'd make it this far. Yet, here I am, 9 days in and feeling pretty good about it. 

As I mentioned in my Birthday post, my family arrived and surprised me yesterday. So, no time this morning to work out. The rest of the day was pretty busy, so I thought I'd take a day off. I figured I've worked out every day, one missed workout won't be the end of me.

All day I felt so tired, by supper time I was ready to pack it in for the night and go to bed. The kids kind of make it tough to just sleep when I feel like it, not to mention the dogs would find all kinds of trouble to get into.

So, I cleaned up the kitchen, washed the dishes...and then I locked myself in the bedroom. I put on my workout clothes, my smurfy blue runners, and knee straps and shoved Jillian in the DVD player.

Now, there is just enough room between the foot of the bed and the dresser for me to squat, lunge and jump. It's a closed space, so I opened the window ( it's about 3C outside) and turned on the ceiling fan. The first set of cardio was excruciating. I was uncoordinated, and off beat. I really didn't want to do it. Then I hit the first strength circuit and I got in the groove. 

I felt really good, and strong! I did 90% of the exercises with the Amazon! At the end I was sweating, but I wasn't feeling like I'd fall over. Perhaps this means I am nearly ready for Level 2??? I think I'll stick to level one for a couple more days, I like feeling successful.   ;o)

Luck of the Irish

With a name like Erin, how can I not wear green and keep my eyes open for the elusive Leprechaun? 

"May you Blessings outnumber the Shamrocks that grow, 

and may trouble avoid you

wherever you go."

Yesterday was my 34th Birthday. I had a wonderful day. My kids ( with the help of Daddy) made and gave me the best mug in the world! ( So far I can only make this photo show up). I love it. They were so excited for me to see it, and even happier when I used it for my morning coffee yesterday and today. Ron was the most excited about giving it to me. So much so that he gave it to me the night before . " You'll need your present tomorrow!" He kept saying. What a guy.

Later that afternoon there was a knock at the door. I scrambled to grab the dogs and get it open before whoever it was left. It was my Mom, Dad and my sister! I was so happy to see them. Their present to me was feeding the kids supper and getting the 3 boys to and from Taekwondo  so Ron and I could go out for supper sans kids!So, off we went to the Honeypot ( local pub/restaurant)  and had a quiet and delicious meal.

34 is going to be great. Thanks to everyone who made it a special day for me.

Day #8....

Good morning! It's looking like another Spring-like day here today. It's mucky and mushy yet, but the beginning of the end of winter. I love it.

I did my 8th day of exercise today, my 7th day of the "30 Day Shred" . I find that I am generally keeping up with Natalie ( AKA "The Amazon" as I like to think of her), and while I was breathing hard today, there was a little less gasping at the end. I used my head today too, and took my glasses off before beginning. Usually I don't remember to take them off until they're sliding down my nose, all fogged up! I'm sure I'm quite a sight, sweating and bouncing around in my living room....I know the dogs try to lick me every time I do floor work. Booth has been in serious danger of getting a foot in the head during the butt-kicks!

It was weigh in day for me today. DOWN 4.1LBS!!!!!!!  Too bad I didn't start doing this a year ago!  ;)

Day #7!!!!!!

I've made it! My Weekaversary!

I slept in this morning ( still adjusting to the time change) and had absolutely no time to work out this morning. All 4 kids had school today, and I had to work ( I clean house twice a week for a client).

After lunch I decided to to the Shred. I was even a little eager, I wanted to see if my endurance had improved at all.

I gave it everything I had....I jumped those jacks, kicked myself in the butt, skipped and punched..... there was also sweating, panting and gasping for air.  I was thoroughly uncomfortable, and in a small amount of pain. Then, it was over! I never would have believed that a week would make such a big difference in my strength and endurance. 

I am paying for it tonight. My knees are so sore, my thighs are wobbly going up and down stairs. My shoulders, my chest...argh.  I don't mind it though. It just means that my body is changing!  Hopefully soon I'll be able to do level 2.

Oh, and the best part! When I got dressed this morning, I was able to tighten my belt one notch tighter! 

I'm not sure if I am ever going to love this exercise thing, but I think I can learn to love how it makes me feel. Well, not this aching post workout pain I have right now , but the other things. I am more energetic during the day. I am doing housework, and not because we have company coming! I'm cheerier, and a tiny bit more patient. I'm drinking water! ( This is a big deal, I really don't like it) I wonder what I'll be writing about 7 days from now.

Day #6.... Meltdown

Did everyone Spring Forward? I hate the time change. For the first few days I feel like I'm always a little behind.
So, it's Sunday Morning. For years my routine has been sleeping in, and generally not doing much. Today was a turning point, I think. I did sleep in a bit ( even later than my body thought, due to time change), and I really had no intention of working out. I still have a cold, I'm congested...I feel pretty crummy. Before I really thought about it though, I was changing into my workout clothes and getting myself a glass of water!
I decided to try my new dvd, Jillian Michaels "Yoga Meltdown". I wanted a change from the Shred, and for some reason, I thought it might be a bit of a break....it was not. I was shaking ans sweating about 10 minutes into the 30 minute workout. It's certainly a different burn the the Shred, but burn it does!
I'm proud of myself today. I tried something new, and I succeeded! It surely was not smooth or graceful, and I may have fallen over a couple of times , but I didn't quit!

Day #5....

I wonder when I'll stop counting in days!

It's Saturday morning and I am done the Shred for today. I can't believe that I got up on a Saturday morning to work out. Anyone who knows me on long or short acquaintance will consider this a minor miracle. I'm surprised at myself, though pleasantly.

I completed level one completely, and 80% of it I didn't do the modified exercises! There's a few parts I still have to drag my butt through, but I can't believe the difference in my endurance from 5 days ago. I'm hoping to see some changes in my body soon too! I know, it's been less than a week...patience and hard work is the key.

I think I said at the beginning that I'm not doing this to get skinny, but to get healthier. I think my habits are getting better, my energy level is up.... I'm starving all the time, but I'm doing my best to make good choices. I'm not willing to give up every treat, instead I'll be living a life of happy moderation. ;)

Day #4....oops

My love/hate relationship with Jillian is late in coming, but it's full blown today. Day #4 of her "30 Day Shred", and I am hurting. Not as bad as day #1, thankfully.
I really didn't want to do it today. I slept in, so it was too late for me to do it before I needed to get the kids ready for school. Once they had left though, I got up, put my runners and bras on ( and the knee supports of course), and turned on the DVD player.( No need to shove Jillian in today, she was still there from yesterday).
For the first part of the workout, I felt good, really good. I made it through the push ups ( still lady style) Then I hit the last round of cardio. Oh, I wanted to quit, as I kicked my butt and panted curses with each breath.
The worst were the abs at the end...I'm not proud, I had to put my legs down for half of it...
I think tomorrow I'll crack open her Hot Yoga DVD I just received...maybe I'll make it through that one. :)

Education Frustration

I had parent/teacher interviews for 2 of the kids today. Sihdney's was after school, and Asher's was after supper. Both were frustrating in their own way, but I think Asher's bothered me the most.
Basically his teacher told me he should be held back. Now, this came as a shock to me, since his report card was very good, with no mention of this anywhere! Sometime in the Fall, his teacher put him on a modified reading/spelling program, without our knowledge ( I was informed after the first report card at the parent/teacher interview). Tonight I am told that because of this modified program, he will not pass into gr.3, but will be placed. WHAT? No one thought to mention this to his lowly parents? This is where the teacher and Special Ed. teacher start talking about how hard gr.3 is ( Behn is in gr.3, and that's a whole other story). Then I'm told that Asher is testing 6 months behind his peers. Again, WHAT? It's March here folks, maybe I should have been informed of this before now. There is an agenda that comes home every day, I write notes for the teacher in this book. Could she not have mentioned something in there?
At the beginning of every school year, we receive a note asking us, as parents, to be Partners in our child's education. I have gone in for meetings, asked ( repeatedly) for work to be sent home ( sporadic at best). At what point do the teachers help me help my children?
I send my kids to school in good faith. The teachers will teach them, and I will support that work at home. When did this become a one sided conversation? I have said it to every teacher at some point in my child's time in school, and lately I've been saying it way too much: I am a STAY AT HOME MOM. I am here every day, to help my kids when and where they need it. We do homework EVERYDAY. Send home the tools I can use to help them!
At this point in my rant, I'd like to point out that Asher's teacher is a lovely woman, and we're very fond of the Special Ed. teacher too. Sadly, I think that makes this even more frustrating.

Day#3....The Shred

Today is my busiest day this week, and when I went to bed last night, I had half decided that I wouldn't have time to work out this morning. My alarm went off at 6:20. I wanted to hit the snooze and roll over, get another 1/2 hour of sleep in. I stretched out on my back, and something in me made me get up, get my super bras on (yes, plural), tie up my shoes and shove Jillian into the DVD player.

I don't want to say this too loudly, but....I think it may be getting a little easier to make it through the workout. Don't misunderstand, I'm still on level1, and I'm not sure I'm going to finish while I'm in the middle of it. I did finish it! I hardly paused, only to wipe the sweat pouring down my face ( so lovely to see, red tomato and my hair curling right there).

Exercise: Day 2

Ouch. I did the "Shred" dvd again this morning, and it's a minor miracle that I am able to type wright now. When my alarm went off this morning, I didn't move any further than I had to, just hit the snooze. While I was laying there, I took stock. Head felt good, neck was a little sore...the rest of me was pretty stiff. I rolled out of bed, feet were throbbing and knees were screaming at me.
Hubby was an angel and drove the kids to school for me, and I got ready for battle. I skipped the foot wraps today, they didn't help yesterday during the workout, but put on the knee braces again. At this point, I still wasn't sure I was going to be able to get through the warm up, never mind all 20 minutes.
While the intro was rolling on the TV ( can't skip it), something occurred to me. I always give myself an "out" when I get on these fitness kicks.Usually it's the pain in my knees ( which can be pretty bad), my sore feet, housework, kids, I'm tired....the list could go on, but I'll quit here. Not today. I did the jumping jacks, the butt kicks, the skipping. I stopped a couple of times to catch by breath, but no more than the 5 seconds that Jillian says you can have. It was hard, and I may have cursed at Jillian more than a few times, out loud ( Sihdney is at school today), but I DID IT! Maybe not a huge deal for real fitness folks, but it was pretty big for me. :o)

Exercise:Day1

I decided ( yet again) to start working out. In the past, my goal was to get skinny, look better, blah blah blah. This time I have a different attitude. I am exercising and eating better to feel better and be healthier. If I lose weihgt a look better too, that's a bonus. A little icing on the cake...the one I won't be eating...or if I do, just a wee smidgen. ;)

I got up this morning, fed the kids breakfast, made lunches, and sent the boys off to school ( Sihdney doesn't go today). I put the wraps on my feet to ease the pain of the plantar fasciitis, put my knee supports on to stop them from snapping out of place, and popped Jillian Michaels " The 30 Day Shred" into the DVD player.

20 minutes, a quick workout. As promised, it was a butt kick....at one point in the dvd she asks you to literally kick yourself in the butt. I'm not sure if this is a valid exercise, or just punishment for being so sadly out of shape to begin with.

I did much better than I thought I would, but I'm sure I'll pay for it tomorrow. To my friend and fellow blogging Mom "Delusional Mom", thanks for inspiring me to get up and moving....though I may curse you, just a little, when I'm hurting later. :o)

Inside Their Heads

I don't think I will ever understand how the minds of my children work, some days I'm pretty sure I don't want to know everything. Today 3 out of 4 of them were reduced to tears, it was certainly an emotional day.
Our youngest had her first time out in....oh, I can't even remember. Daddy walked them home after school. It was Dr.Seuss Day, and to celebrate they made "Cat in the Hat" hats. Sihdney handed it off to Dad, who promptly folded it ( very gently as to not crease it) to protect it from the wind. She said nothing, but made it plain that this was the wrong thing to do when she refused to walk with him, talk to him, or look at him. This then progressed to throwing dirty looks his way when he spoke to her. Well, being this blatantly rude is a no-go around here. She was asked to apologize for being rude, she refused. When shown that her Hat was just fine, she still wouldn't say sorry. So, time out on the steps commenced. For the first few minutes all was quiet. I should have known it was too good to be true...she asked to go to her room. I told her no, since her room is full of all the things she loves. Well, she threw the floodgates open! Tears ( of the crocodile variety) were streaming down her face, soaking the front of her pretty pink shirt. She wailed at top volume, like she'd lost her very best friend. What a show! We're trying not to laugh, as it's so dramatic, and so very unlike her to behave like this. Later, when she had subsided a bit, we went to her room and talked. Through her remaining tears and a few little hiccoughs, she tells me she'll say sorry to Dad ( which she did, with a big hug). While setting the table, she tells me she thinks she was angry because she was hungry. What a gem!


Now, you'd think that would be the end of melodrama for the day. Not yet, the kids were still up.

My son Asher is a lively, vibrant, emotional boy. If I had to describe him in one word, it would be Vivid. For the past week he has been grumpy, frustrated, and taking out on those near and dear to him. This usually means he's building up to telling me he's worried about something, or he's going to confess to some deep,dark sin he's been beating himself up for. Tonight, the dam broke. I had him tucked under his duvet, given him a kiss on the forehead, and leaned in for a goodnight hug. He was all tight, a little ball of stress. Quietly, I asked him what was wrong. His reply: " I'll be lonely when I have to live all alone in a house!" and then " I don't think I'll ever be able to spell Canada!" Oh,my poor boy. To have been so worried for so long, over that! We talked about how far away being an adult is for him, and how he'll never be alone since he comes from a big family that loves him. Another hug and a kiss, and a quick drink of water...crisis averted for now.

You'd think that would be it, what else could happen when the day is nearly over for them...you'd be wrong.

Behn, our second born son, is crying in the Family room. He's got his knees pulled up into the very large McGregor Family Reunion shirt he's wearing for pj's, lips puffed out, eyes all red. So, I ask him what's wrong. " What if I don't get to see Dexter when I grow up and move away?" ( Dexter is our 7lb terrier cross). Oh my boy! Another big hug from me, telling him he can see Dexter whenever he wants... I'll leave the " Life Span of a Dog" talk for another night.

As for Jacob, he had a great day! Thank goodness for small favours!


Goodnight!

There are I will miss, things I will not

I'm sure I have mentioned that we have 4 kids. They are the Screaming Meemies, whom I love with all my being, and who can make me weak and weepy with their antics.
They can really drive me crazy, all for different reasons, seldom at the same time. One looks at me like I'm speaking in tongues when he is asked a question. One is so dreamy, he sometimes forgets to come on back to our realm and join in. One lives his life on a roller coaster, where the lights are spinning and you never know what's around the corner. Our youngest, the only girl, is a Princess with a capital "P" and a quirky sense of humour.
I spent 4 hours in the van with them today, along with my husband and the 2 dogs. During this drive through the flat, sometimes hypnotic prairie, they took turns bugging each other, or tattling when it tickled their fancy. The age old question of " Are we there yet?" would be thrown out just to see if we might answer one more time.
I grew agitated, I scolded for minor squabbles and spilled snacks. At one point they were all quiet, so I took a peak at them in my rear view mirror( to see what they were up to). Nothing was happening. 2 were playing DS, one was asleep and one stared out the window. In that instant, I realized that soon they won't all want to come with us. Our oldest will want to stay home with his friends, the other will have lives of their own.
I won't vow to not get angry at them anymore, or become frustrated at their antics...but I will try to remind myself that one day in the not too distant future, I will miss it all.

Just like me....

It figures....I start a blog, then let it sit idle for a few days. Too lazy, too tired, too...whatever to post a new entry. It's Monday, and plenty has happened over the weekend. Yet, right now, at this moment, all I can think of is how sleepy I feel at the moment, and how nice a nap would be.

A friend of mine, a wonderful, inspirational woman who blogs here as well (http://randomthoughtsofadelusionalmom.blogspot.com/) has certainly been putting me to shame. She's taken on some big challenges in the last couple of weeks, and I'm feeling the spirit move in me. Well, right now the spirit is gooey black guilt, but I can see a smidgen of light around the edges.

I will be turning 34 this month. Not that old, but a little scary for me. It's not about the number, it's that I have done very little to improve myself since I turned 30. I have made a broken a thousand promises to myself...lose weight, exercise, be more patient, laugh more, smile more.

So, no big promises this birthday, just a quietly whispers resolution to do my best, and be happier with what I've been blessed with.